Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize
