So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
