I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
