can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
sex in a hospital.. check
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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