He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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