yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Of course I have a pirate flag
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
