you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I just had sex on a roof
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
