god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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