Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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