Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
