I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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