Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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