Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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