good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
