Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
