tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Shame is for Republicans.
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