That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
