Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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