weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
