Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
