No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
