Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
