Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
