In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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