I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
