If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
