He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
