We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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