you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Randomize
