okay pat passed out under dana's car
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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