i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
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