just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
