Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
My vagina just recognized that song.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
