Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
i think my mom watched the whole time
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
