About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
