his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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