you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
