if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
