My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
