what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
i think im in europe. pls send help
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
