i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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