You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize