Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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