Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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