Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
