So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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