i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Randomize