My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
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