I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
