Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
